Slogan Fifteen

Four practices are the best methods.

From the Lojong for the Layperson booklet:

Four things can help us cultivate an awakened heart and mind:

1) Accumulating merit – This is not giving so we will receive, but a way to open and give wholeheartedly without any strategy plays by the ego. We let go of fear and hope, refuse to shield our hearts and accept what is. We give what we find hard to let go of.

2) Acknowledging evil (neurotic) actions – This action has four parts: regret, refraining, remedial action, and resolution. Awareness and mindfulness make it hard to hide from ourselves. We get sick and tired of what we see, which leads us to want to put a stop to it. We refrain because we realize the chain of misery it sets off. We commit ourselves to freedom, and are encouraged and gain confidence from the success of others. We gently resolve not to repeat our neurotic actions.

3) Offering to the dons – The dons are those emotions that seem to take possession of us, like anger, fear or depression. When we recognize we've been “possessed,” we can regard these moments as opportunities for mindfulness and awareness. We can be grateful for this wake-up call to become open and expansive rather than closed-hearted.

4) Offering to the dharma protectors – The dharma protectors are like shepherds who give us direction, let us know when we have strayed and point the way back to the path. These guides represent the wisdom of awareness and reveal to us how to overcome obstacles through our practice.

Photo: Fringe tree berries, roses, immature pine cone, liriope blooms.

            The Four Practices are practical ways we can use lojong in our daily life. Here are some simple examples of what these might look like:

1. As you walk out to retrieve your morning newspaper, you notice the paperboy has tossed your elderly neighbor’s paper beneath a shrub. You retrieve it and place it by her front door.

2. At the grocery store, you start to add a gallon of ice cream to your cart, but pause when you think about how tight your waistband has been getting. It’s been your late night comfort food, and the way you've handled stress for a month now. You realize that soon you’re not going to fit into your pants if you keep this behavior up, so you put back the ice cream and buy some sliced apples instead.

3. Later that day, you and your teenage daughter get into an argument than ends with her retreating behind a slammed door. Angry about her attitude, you start to march in without knocking and give her an earful. Instead you pause and recognize this as an opportunity to practice deep listening skills.

4. In the evening, you speak with a friend and mentor about a new woman in the book club you attend. This woman disagrees with every view presented and refuses to consider any perspective other than her own. Your friend suggests using this situation as a way to practice patience and kindness rather than focusing on how you can "put her in her place."